Each season, without fail, we just need to take a few minutes to talk about The Bachelor.

During Ali’s season, I looked like Roberto’s mom.

During Brad’s season, @BradWomack followed me on twitter.

And during Ashley’s season, we felt sorry for Ben and celebrated JP.

. . . . .

If you don’t watch The Bachelor, I respect that. Just feel free to ignore this post. But I also think you should read this article about why smart girls do watch it. Because smart girls do watch it. Lots of them. As in, all of them.

[And let me go ahead and insert this --> my friends and I watch The Bachelor for ENTERTAINMENT. Not for WISDOM or ADVICE or BEHAVIOR SUGGESTIONS. Amen.]

. . . . .

I had a great post planned… I’ve been thinking about it all week. The girls I wanted to discuss… mainly cute Kacie from Tennessee, to whom I want to say, “seriously, sister, move to Nashville. We will find you a beau.” She’s great and I want her to date my friends [any of them] so that she and I can be friends. Is that too much to ask? And of course, we would need to talk about the insane blogger Jenna who left early in the season but not before leaving her looney mark on the whole thing.

But then I watched this week’s episode. Now listen, I was not Ben’s biggest fan when this whole thing started. I like the guy, sure. He handled Ashley’s rejected proposal with class and maturity.

But man oh man. This week. He really messed up.

It’s not that in seasons before everyone has been classy and wholesome. It’s just that he and Courtney sneaking off and skinny-dipping in the ocean kinda changed The Bachelor game forever. You don’t do that. You play by the rules of the show. And they aren’t.

Maybe the producers cooked it all up; at the least they allowed it. Regardless, ick.

Can you IMAGINE if he is engaged to another girl from this season and she SAW that? If they weren’t broken up before, I bet they were by 11pm EST Monday night.

[Of course, I say all this fully aware that I do not know these people. I have a small number of high profile friends and when people on the internet express incorrect opinions about their lives, I tend to cringe at their assumptions. So if you are real life friends with Ben, forgive me if I'm wrong here. But he did choose to live his love life on television.... so....]

And if he is engaged to Courtney, can you imagine what he is thinking after seeing all the interviews, etc?

So. I’m talking about Ben the Bachelor today because I said I would, but I think I’m done with him and this will be the last time. He is proving things to me about how some guys think that make me feel very insecure. Courtney is showing a woman’s ability to manipulate to get what she wants, and I think that is terrible too. They seem to be displaying the worst parts of our human natures and to watch that reminds me of the worst parts of me. Again, ick.

I’m sure they are nice people and maybe I’ll be friends with them someday. Maybe they are different in private than they are on the show [I'm 100% sure that is the case] and maybe they’ve been edited terribly.

No matter what, the truth is I just don’t want to watch their lives anymore. This show is supposed to be fun entertainment and after this week’s episode, it’s just not so fun now.

This season lacks integrity. Mock me for saying it because hello it is The Bachelor. But it seems in seasons past, there have been moments of redemption, where you legitimately believe people might find love and are there in order to do so.

The only redeeming thing from this season? Sweet Kacie. Come on, girl. Let’s be friends.

And listen. Next season when Emily is The Bachelorette? Oh, I’ll be back on board like nobody’s biz-nass. Because that girl is the sweetest thing going.

. . . . .

What are your thoughts? Am I totally off base here? Are you loving this season? Who do you think Ben ends up with? [And please no spoilers!]

. . . . .

[And happy birthday to my baby sister Sally! You're the coolest. Sorry you're sharing a post with Ben and Courtney. Thanks for being nothing like the characters they are playing on TV. Love you.]

Today is a big day at Vanderbilt University. Let me see if I can explain this correctly in normal people terms.

The policy makers at Vandy have written a new nondiscrimination policy.

[That's good. Discriminating is mean.]

Except.

This particular policy says that no organizations on campus can discriminate because of the core beliefs of that organization.

For example, if an atheist wants to be a leader at a Christian organization, that organization must let the person run for leadership. Or if a leader gets elected in the spring, changes beliefs in the summer, the organization cannot remove that person from leadership in the fall.

So. That’s bad. Organizations of all kind should be allowed to decide what type of leader they have AND they should be allowed to ensure that leader adhere’s to the core beliefs of the organization.

Here is an article about an important meeting today and here is an opinion piece by a Christian leader at Vandy.

Here’s another great article explaining it way better than I did. [Seriously.]

Why do I care?

Great question.

I care because I believe God wants to move in the lives of the college students here in Nashville. I believe that the winds are changing in this town and the college students are feeling the breeze. I watch on Sunday nights at our college ministry service and I see what God is doing. And I know part of the reason I am in Nashville is to usher the presence of God into the lives of college students.

And I feel like this is a battle.

I can’t explain the feeling I have in my knower about this, but I feel like it has big implications for the future of the spiritual climate for college students at Vandy and beyond.

So I’m asking you to take three minutes today and pray for today’s meeting. Pray for religious freedom at Vanderbilt. Pray for revival to pour through these college students. Pray that this will turn the hearts of the students TOWARDS Christ.

Pray that in the meeting tonight, God would be glorified.

I grew up doing puzzles. Working puzzles? Constructing puzzles? Puzzling puzzles? I don’t really know.

My grandmother loved them. She always had one in the works at her house or when we went on vacation. It’s one of my strongest and fondest memories.

But somehow, I previously had yet to adopt this hobby into my own life.

[Because I'm not 75? Maybe.]

As an author, I spend a lot [read: too much] time in front of my computer. And when it is time to relax, I like to avoid words and my computer. So while I love reading [you know I LOVE READING], there are lots of times where I just want to step. away. from. the. alphabet.

Within the last four weeks, puzzles have made a massive comeback in my life. And I am realizing it is the PERFECT hobby for me.

Those of you who know me well will appreciate this next sentence –> Last week, I worked on the puzzle for two hours while I watched episodes of The Waltons.

[How in the WORLD am I supposed to get a date when I write stuff like that on the internet?]

And then just yesterday, I played the Wicked soundtrack all the way through while trying my darndest to finish the leafy sky.

Here’s why I love puzzles:

1. It involves zero words.

2. It is mindless but totally challenging. At least this one is. 1000 pieces of Post-Impressionism? Ouchies.

3. A normal person could walk away at any time and return later. [I have issues. I need to finish certain areas. Don't judge.]

4. Multiple people can contribute. There are currently about five of us working/contributing/puzzling this puzzle.

5. It does something good to your heart to escape from your today. I’ve watched a boy with a broken heart finish the red lady’s dress and a girl with heavy decisions on her mind put together an entire field.

6. You can do the puzzle over and over again. I don’t know if I will [this one is about to make me or break me], but I like that you can.

7. You have a lifelong hobby. [I *think* this is my way of convincing the world that IT IS COOL FOR A 30-SOMETHING TO ENJOY PUZZLES, OKAY?]

So, I guess this whole post is a confession that if you follow me on Twitter or Instagram, you are probably going to continue to see pictures of this puzzle as it progresses. And now that I have justified it, I will quit giving myself such a hard time for being a dork.

. . . . .

What’s your favorite hobby? Any other puzzle lovers out there?

Here are two short [not comprehensive] lists.

Some things I am good at:

- making chicken and dumplings [betcha didn't know that.]

- cheering for my favorite team until the bitter end [The Georgia Bulldogs? Have mercy.]

- wearing a lot of glitter/sequins/sparkles [I am going to write an entire post about my NYE dress. Because it is the most beautiful thing I've ever owned ever and I would wear it every day if it was socially acceptable. Alas, it is not.]

Some things I am the worst at:

- keeping resolutions [read on....]

- making sweet tea [I try. I really do.]

- wearing high heels from the start of an event until the very end [I can't and I won't.]

. . . . .

So the fact that it is the third day of 2012 and I have only flossed 1/3 of the year when I absolutely told my dentist I would floss 365 times in 2012 does not surprise me one bit. Because something in my mind said “resolution for 2012″ and something else in my brain said “nope, we don’t do those.”

[But y'all. Seriously. We should all be flossing. I'm not making an excuse for my dental behaviors, or lack thereof.]

So here’s my only plan for 2012.

I’m going to write.

[Everything else I do will be a total surprise to all of us. ]

. . . . .

I still feel a bit out of sorts in my Nashville life. Don’t get me wrong, I’m so happy. So so happy. I’m almost giggly. I’m staying with some dear friends while I search for a home and I can’t find that ONE BLUE DRESS in my storage unit that I want to wear and while some exciting things are happening, they make my life feel unstable… in a fun bounce house kind of way.

Which is why when GMail tried to change the way my inbox looked, I absolutely refused. I’m just in that place in my life where I need something to look just like it did in January of 2011 thank you very much. Also, the new design is totally ugly, isn’t it?

. . . . .

See these dots between topics? That’s because I have lost my ability to transition.

. . . . .

Have you seen the comments from the (in)courage post about being single? Whoa to the whoa. Y’all. Have you ever? I told my friends that I feel like I’ve gathered all these women together and now I have to stand in front of them and very dramatically say, “Thank you all for coming here today! I have no idea what to say to you!”

Kidding. I’ll figure it out. God is stirring up some things at (in)courage that we are going to share soon and it’s all very fun and interesting and wow.

. . . . .

Your prayers during this transitional period would be really sweet.

. . . . .

I’m really REALLY excited about 2012. Are you?

Luke 2: 8-14

Merry Christmas, y’all.

Remind me of nights like last night…. when I’m sitting in a venue surrounded by friends that I love. When familiar faces I haven’t seen yet keep popping up in my peripheral vision. When the hugs are plentiful and the joy is palpable. When the musicians make me laugh because they are funny on stage and funny in person.

We were at a concert that, for lack of better words, just felt like a ton of our friends in one room singing along to our favorite Christmas songs. I never wanted to cry… I kept thinking I would. But instead, I can’t wipe last night’s smile off my face. I just smile when I think about what happens when our friends pay money to watch our friends perform. It’s good.

On the bad days, remind me of how lucky I am to have friends that make me swell with pride. I have spent the last few days spending every waking moment away from my computer [as you can probably tell... sorry.] and in the presence of my people here. I am so proud of them. Not in a mom way, that’s weird. But in a, “man, five months away can sure make you appreciate your people and their talent.”

Do you tell your friends that you are proud of them? I wonder, and hope, that my friends know that their art slays me. That the girls at the Mocha Club office inspire me with their hustle. That good songs become great songs with the songwriters are caring and loving friends. So I’ve spent many a moment across the table from someone saying things like, “you’re amazing,” or “you know not everyone can do that, right?”

Needless to say, I am basking in the warmth of my Nashville life- of new opportunities to serve my church and old friends who pick up right where we left off. I am spending day after day running into people I love in public places and the surprise on my face is never feigned. I mean it. Probably the biggest thing I missed in Scotland was running into people I knew in public. So it’s the highlight of my day every time it happens.

There are some whoa-awesome book things going on [not just the Christmas pack] that I can’t talk about but keep me pretty busy… as SOON as I can spill it, I will. Don’t you worry about that. And on the days when I hate writing [which, if you are writer, you know those days come along], remind me of the days like today when I’m set to burst over wishing I could tell you things.

Sorry the blog has been quiet. Re-entry hasn’t been 100% easy and processing with my people has been necessary. But also, sitting with my people has been necessary. Listening to stories of heartbreak over burritos. Listening to stories of weddings over sushi. Listening to stories of births over candy jars. Listening to stories of revival over apple cider.

And sharing my stories as well.

I’m happy to be home. I’m glad for the beautiful season the Lord is giving me upon returning to Nashville.

But I know it won’t always be easy. It’s definitely not a flawless town with flawless people. Things will settle into normal and life will get busy and there will be days, for the rest of my life, when I miss Edinburgh with every breath.

So someday, long from now, when I somehow forget that I am right smack in the middle of exactly where I want to be, remind me.

There are a few things I need to tell you about.

And no, I will not be talking about nail polish. [Though, there are some BEAUTIFUL colors listed in the comments of that post ... if that is your thing, I highly suggest you check them out.]

First, I have to say. Pintrest. I can’t do it. I just can’t. I want to real bad. But I’m already trying to blog and get my book in lots of hands and work on a second book and answer emails and do my Mocha Club job well and cook at home and be the secretary-ish for Crossroads Church Edinburgh. Also, I watch a lot of Ally McBeal. So I just really can’t add Pintrest to my life right now.

But do you love it? Just tell me. Do you?

I mean, we’re all busy. But you fit it in your life. Convince me I can fit it in mine and I’ll give in.

I’m not a tough sell here, folks.

Anyways, for today, pretend like I love it already and this is a board of things I’m totally obsessed with right now.

1. Mat Kearney’s new album Young Love. It’s the perfect ending to a great summer. And this is my favorite song, Count on Me. It’s adorable and fun.

2. Circuit Riders podcast. YWAM, the mission-sending organization, has recently completed a teaching series for a school they put on in Kona, Hawaii called Circuit Riders. I’ve listened to about half of the teachings and they will KNOCK.YOUR.SOCKS.OFF. Namely, please listen to Ray Hughes. He’s absolutely lyrical in his teaching. Here is the link to the podcast.

3. Old Made Good in Nashville. Though I’m obviously not currently able to walk into the shop, almost daily the OMG team posts pictures on facebook of vintage furniture or art that make me drool. Including this classic pulldown map of Tennessee. I want it real bad.

4. Sodoku. I’ve loved it before, but I love it again. One of the best activities for me on the bus. Especially now that I sorta know my way around town, I don’t have to be 100% focused on the bus route. Also, my friend Adam says that it will help prevent alzheimer’s.

5. Etsy wreaths. I am DYING over these wreaths and globes on Things That We Love. I’m particularly obsessed with this vintage paper wreath.

Right? Do you love or what? AND AND AND!! You have a coupon code!

Use SUMMER25 and get 25% off your order!

Boom. Cause that’s how we roll around here.

. . . . .

Ok, so those are my current can’t quits.

Got any obsessions right now? Share on.

I think I have given you all ample time to watch the season finale of The Bachelorette. As in, I don’t even live in America right now and I’ve already been able to watch it.

So this post will continue on discussing all things Bachelorette. If you haven’t seen the finale [or if you don't care at all], you may want to move on to your next internet destination.  Because seriously, if you don’t speak Bachelorese, the rest of this post is going to be a foreign language.

You’ve been warned.

I’m not sure we’ve even properly discussed Ashley being chosen as The Bachelorette. I’ll be honest, our crew of Bach-watchers were not overly thrilled. Ashley’s insecurities during Brad’s season were a little much and I could not imagine an entire season of that biz-nass. But, luckily, she pulled it together a bit more this time around and it made for decent television.

Bentley. All I’m going to say is that his plan to be the bad boy succeeded but most likely caused him to be excommunicated from his town and the name “Bentley” will probably drop in popularity significantly for the 3-5 years. I feel sorry for him, but only to the extent of, “I bet he didn’t think he would be hated THIS much.” But if we ever need an example of “here is the type of dude you do NOT want,” we’ve got it.

He behaved horribly and I can’t wait until someone offers him enough money that he decides to do an interview. [Which, BTW, how did he get out of being on Men Tell All? I thought that was a contractual agreement? I should ask Ally McBeal.]

We don’t even have time to discuss the dude who got drunk and passed out on the first night, Jeff and his mask, William and his TERRIBLE sense of humor [and his job as a cell phone salesman], Wes and his family issues, creepily happy Ryan, etc. The crew of guys did not disappoint in the freakazoid category.

Fast forward to the finale.

Ben vs. JP.

I was always a JP fan. I think he’s a solid dude and ever since he had the date the night of Bentley’s exit, I hoped it would be him. And through the season, he seemed to be the one who was most solid. When he met her family? All that jazz with Ashley’s sister? That was ridiculous. I think the sis wants to be famous and wanted to cause a scene and boy howdy did she do it. Not impressed.

Poor Ben. Am I right? I mean, kudos to him for being honest and vulnerable and going with his heart. But the amount of proclamations he did during the interviews… I just felt terrible for him. “We’re adding to the family today” and stuff of that nature? I mean, bless him.

But gracious, when we knew he was getting the boot but he interrupted Ashley and proposed? Ouch x a million = I couldn’t look away and I just wanted it to be over for his sake.

You know, in reality, I envy Ben. I envy the way he lived in hope. Sure, he ended up losing and probably feeling dumb, but bravo to him for being honest with his feelings and his heart.

JP winning in the end was great. I loved their proposal. I think she feels safe and cared for by him- maybe it’s his age or his settled place in life. But I don’t think Ashley was looking to start the adventure with Ben. I think she wanted to step into the adult life of JP.

I know the odds are against them, but I do hope they make it.

[I totally borrowed this from ABC- I promise I didn't take the time to make it myself. It is sorta hilarious, no?]

[And big hugs to the Bach-watchers back in Nashville. I miss you like whoa.]

What were your thoughts on this season?

Who was your favorite bachelor? [Mine was Ryan M.]

Who do you think will be the next Bachelor?

Y’all know I’m usually on the front line back line of fashion trends and that may be the case today as well. But I am now the proud owner of feathers in my hair.

Also. Let me just go ahead and say. I’m sure these are not real feathers from real birds. No way. The colors are too crazy. These are fake feathers. But I love them just the same.

These feathers are put in your hair just like extensions, except, you know, they are wildly colored, not matching your own hair. Do you love or WHAT?!? We live in a funny world.

My hairstylist, Anna, is also a good friend and she was all, “Annie. What colors do you want? Let’s do this thang!” And I was all, “It’s almost my birthday. Let’s do blue. I LOVE BLUE.”

And then she proceeded to put the blue one in. A vivid and fluffy and totally Annie blue one. And then she put in a yellow one. And then, just for good measure, a brown and khaki striped one.

I. Know.

I love them too.

[And by the way, when my hair is down, you can't see all the crazy of the blue. So don't worry- it doesn't look that out of place. I think you were worried. Don't be.]

Back to the feathers-in-hair situation. I’m a bandwagon trendy kind of girl- if everyone else loves it, I usually do too… at some point. And that is definitely happening here – as in, I may have missed the arc of popularity, which I am okay with/used to, but better late than never.

But these three feathers mean more to me than just being trendy.

[You're gonna have to go with me on this one. It is a bit of a stretch when I'm explaining it, but it makes total sense to my heart...]

I leave Nashville this week and I won’t be back until December. I am super excited about the opportunity to go to Scotland, but I am also SUPER DEE DUPER sad about leaving Nash.

I love this place. I love these people. I love them so much.

And every time I look in the mirror, I now have a bright happy blue reminder of my home. I’ve been marked by my people and no matter where on Earth I go, I look like I belong in Nashville. I look like my people.

Maybe it feels like a tribal marking.

Maybe it feels like blue skin from The Hunger Games series.

Maybe it is just a simple reminder of home.

My emotions calmed significantly today and I thought about the feathers. I’ve been HIGHLY EMOTIONAL DEAR HEAVENS for the last two days, but something about these feathers said to my brain, “this is your home. You fit here.”

And these feathers remind me of home. Of my people. Of arms wrapped around each other and laughter and serious moments. Of hugs and I love you’s and the gift of community that I’ve been given. Of these friends who showed July 4th what a real celebration looks like and of the other friends in this town that have also grown to be family.

So forgive me if blogging is a bit scarce for the next week-ish. Thursday is my birthday [yay! 31! I love my 30s! seriously!] and then I leave Nashville on Friday and then I fly to Scotland on Monday.

The next few days are filled with meaningful dinners, hugs whenever I want, celebrating brand new engagements [three this week!] and brand new pregnancies, birthday meals, and tears galore.

I’ll be that magic combo of mourning and celebrating, crying and laughing, and pretty much being a complete hot mess.

Doesn’t leave a lot of time for blogging, what with the crying and laughing and packing and hugging and goodbyes and all.

Pray for me, if you will. I’m grateful for the opportunity to live out the truth that God means more to me than anybody else, but leaving my friends is breaking my heart.

I’m also grateful today for these crazy feathers. Because I know when I see them, I will think of Nashville. And home won’t feel so far away.

Sunday at church, we sang this chorus over and over again.

In my life, be lifted high.

In my world, be lifted high.

In my love, be lifted high.

And I cried. [I know you are shocked. Because hello I cry like other people breathe.]

Two weeks from today I land in Scotland and I’ll be there for five months.

FIVE MONTHS.

In my life…

My life is changing so much. At my BFFroomie Laura’s birthday on Saturday, I had my first goodbye. And it broke my heart. I moved out of the house the next day and I’m staying with a family until I leave. I’m not brave. I’m worried that so much will happen while I’m gone. I’m missing weddings and engagements and breakups and babies and life.

I know it’s just 5 months. I know it’s an amazing opportunity. I know I know I know.

But it’s not free.

My friend Skip says I have ATMS Disease- “Afraid To Miss Something” – and I’ll tell you what. My ATMS is RAGING right now. Absolutely raging.

And Sunday morning, when I sang, “In my life, be lifted high…” I thought of my friends and the ATMS and the lives that will keep on going without me. And I thought about how, even though it feels like a major sacrifice to leave my people, I want God to be lifted high in my life- and I think Scotland is where that happens this fall.

In my world….

As we sang, I thought of Scotland. And Cape Town. And Costa Rica. And France. And Prague. And all the places where people I know and love are serving God. And I thought of my little world– the girls who read my book, the friends [you!] who read my blog, my friends, my family.

God has given each of us a world. You have a world. I have a world. And I want God to be lifted high in my world.

In my love…

I just love my people. I know you love your people too. I love the little ones that make me laugh and I love the big ones that make me laugh. I love my Marietta people and my Nashville people and my people in the USA and my people in other countries. And I think God puts that in our hearts as a way we can worship Him. The Bible even says that when we care for other people it is like we are caring for Jesus. (Matthew 25: 31-46)

So I sat in church thinking of how I love my church, my pastor, my friends who sit around me, and I thought about how loved I feel in that place.

And I told God how much I feel Him lifted high in that place.

In my life, be lifted high.

In my world, be lifted high.

In my love, be lifted high.

We’ve sang that chorus for years. And yet, this Sunday, it broke my heart and changed me.

. . . . . .

What is your favorite worship song?