As most of you know, we like to do Top 5 Fridays around here… where we talk about one topic and list five of our favorite things. And so we shall today, this our last Friday in October.
Newsflash: I’m single. And I’m 31.
But those two facts don’t scare me. They are what they are- truth for today. But they won’t be true forever. I can’t help but turn 32 in 2012 and I hope and pray and think I’ll be married someday.
I believe that God’s telling a story with my life that I hope includes a cool husband and kids and we’ll be a family that makes waves for the Kingdom. For some reason, part of that story involves me being single SIGNIFICANTLY LONGER THAN I EVER PLANNED.
Of all the things going on in my life, this takes the most courage: believing God for my future, trusting God’s heart for me, and walking daily in the joy of my current relationship status.
. . . . .
So for today’s Top 5 Friday, let’s talk about five ways to be courageously single.
1. Have fun.
Listen. I get it. It isn’t always easy to be single. Whether you are 14 or 41, it can feel hard. But there are tons of advantages to being single- financially, time commitment-wise, even laundry-wise. So have fun! Enjoy this time. Go somewhere new. Spend your money [wisely] on things you care about. Have a great time with your friends. I am sure marriage is fun- I don’t doubt that- but we singlets are a bit more carefree and limitless. Revel in that while you can.
2. Be thankful.
Well done, you. You are single because you are waiting for the right human to come alongside you. Be thankful for every regret you don’t have and be thankful for the forgiveness given for the rest of it. Be thankful that God knows what is going on and you are never far from His thoughts. Be thankful for every selfish day you get to live.
[Example: I hate olives. I don't have to eat them or cook with them. My husband may love them. I will compromise... maybe. But for now, I don't have to touch the suckers. And I am grateful.]
Life is far more enjoyable if you will focus, and be grateful for, the good things you DO have instead of focusing on the things you DON’T have. Brave people are thankful people.
3. Work on you.
I know it is a bit cliche, but I don’t care. It is important that you become the kind of person that you want to marry. You see, I want to marry someone who is brave, a man who is willing to take God-spoken risks for the sake of the Gospel. I want to marry someone who is generous with his time and money. I want to marry someone who is committed to personal growth and maturity. So I pursue those things as well.
Do you want a spouse who is courageous? Then grow in courage.
If God could get tired of a person praying about a particular situation, then my single self would have exhausted Him by now. But He doesn’t. But sometimes I get insecure that He does. And then I’m reminded that Hebrews 4 says I can approach the throne of grace with confidence [as often as I want]. It takes courage to ask for something over and over again. It’s vulnerable every time.
SO DO IT.
[See? It's growing your prayer life AND making you brave. Like a combo meal, if you will. ]
The worst thing we can do, as singles, is decide to to sit at home and wait to live exciting lives once we are married. There are a few things that should wait for marriage [don't make me say it], but LIVING isn’t one of them. Go. Do. Be. LIVE. You don’t want a spouse who has sat around for years doing nothing… so don’t be that guy either. Be brave. Make brave choices. Love your life. You only get to live today one time.
You know what brave people do? Brave people look at the situation they are in and figure out how to get the most out of it.
So do that.
. . . . .
What tips would give for those trying to live courageously single?